Making a Genogram is one way to describe your family tree. The genogram has three uses. First, the genogram depicts the family tree. The structure comprises family members, genders, and whether they are biologically related or not. This is true for all ages. In addition to personality traits, genograms record birth dates, behavioral/emotional concerns, significant illnesses, nodal events, and other data. A genogram also shows the closeness and dispute between and among family members. A genogram also highlights intergenerational tendencies.
In creating this genogram, I will look at my family's patterns and notable inventions throughout four generations. My grandparents, parents, brother, spouse, children, and I constitute the four generations. I will also examine my family structure and relationships. Using essential ideas, I will also discuss the links and patterns seen in the genogram. My family is small, yet it is full of character. Learning about my family's history will help me better understand myself and the influence my family's history has had on me.
My great-grandmother had three girls. Her eldest daughter died. My grandma was briefly married to both of my aunts' fathers, but both are gone. Their marriage date is unknown. My grandparents married in 1960. My grandpa, Everette Lee Coleman, married my grandmother, Evert Lee Battle, using her maiden name. My grandma became Shirley Battle. My mum was born in 1963: Gloria Coleman, my grandfather's name. To make up for giving my grandmother his mother's maiden name, I believe my grandpa gave it to me.
My parents met in high school. My mother became pregnant in her final year. I was born on January 25, 1982. I was both my parents' first grandchild. My parents started a family custom of giving me two birthday cakes every year. My parents were quite close when I was a youngster. My grandparents adored me. My grandfathers were both alive when I was born, but I don't know if they were active in my life. My family took care of me when I was a youngster. Gehart (2014) defines homeostasis as a collection of behavioural, emotional, and interactional standards that create family stability. My paternal grandpa died three years after my birth. My grandfather's death was a life-altering event for my paternal family. My father grew distant when my grandfather died. Then he started sleeping with my mum. My father and mother grew apart.
The arrival of my first sibling was a welcome surprise. On weekends, I would see him and my father. So did my brother. When my brother was nine, he moved home with my grandparents. Overcame my brother with emotion at the time. My father would not let him be with his mother. The readings say this is an interactional/systemic issue. According to Gehart, "more of the same remedies mishandle the situation in three ways. No action is performed in the horrible simplification phase (Gehart, 2014, pg68). My father denied my brother's issue. Their relationship suffered because of it. So I viewed my brother as helpless and rescued him.
Heaven Thomas was Michael and my first child. Her birthday is October 29. Her birthday is two days after mine. Heaven died after a rough birth. This made me sad. I was eager to start trying for a baby. But I'm advised to remain patient. According to the book, I was employing the utopian syndrome. In the romantic syndrome stage, one seeks to fix something that cannot be changed or is non-existent. I couldn't bring Heaven back. Michael and I split in December 2003, but we remain friends.
So I met him in 2006. I think we were in the family development stage of relationship creation. Amari Tyler was born on December 27, 2007. In honour of his father's birthday. Jerome and I married on June 28. We were a mixed family now. Our home has two ex-girlfriends' children and a son.
Moving inside the building with my family affected the way we interacted. The household borders shifted. According to Gehart (2014), determining effective vs. insufficient boundaries requires assessing the cultural environment, family life stage, and symptomatic behaviour. My grandma and father began to entangle and disperse. They often made assumptions about what was going on at home. When we reprimanded them, they often showed extreme concern for my children and overprotectiveness. My kids acclimated to this enmesh and diffused boundaries over time. I think it was partly due to our differing parenting techniques. My husband and I had to tell my grandma and father no while disciplining our kids. This weakened our parental hierarchy. My brother always respected my home's limits and had nice connections with everyone. We loved one other despite our quarrels. In 2014, my family dynamic shifted. My father died in a highway vehicle accident. My family struggled with the transition.
Creating this genogram made me realize how much my family is alike. My two grandmas divorced. My grandparents' children had many dads. My grandfathers were also missing from the house. This was also visible in my mother's father's connection. This trend was seen in my spouse and me. This was a flaw in my family lineage. I saw this as a lack of good communication or connection-building abilities. What if the partnerships' complimentary dynamics made them feel stuck? Also, all the men in my and my husband's families had died.
I also noted that each generation lost a kid. I also saw a similarity with my grandparents' children's ages. My maternal grandmother had two live girls and two living boys. It was a mixed bag. I wondered whether this had any meaning. I also learned that my children's birthdays are near to relatives. That was a family strength. I feared my family would forget their birthdays.
This task taught me that my family is little yet mighty. I recognized we had several obstacles. We have evolved through all of the deaths. We adopted the status growth model even though we had no notion where we were in our lives. It seems like we are perpetually at the practice stage of this model. I am glad I could learn from my ancestors. The reasons I trust cherish and maintain relationships are now clearer. With this information, I aim to transform my family's future.
Author: Frank Lowes
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